This deworming video class I'm taking in the brig says "money is the root of all evil" but honestly roots are kinda dope like maybe money is a potato or yucca, did they ever consider that send toot

Things you didn't know mice could do:

-enter your dreams and steal all your secrets and blackmail you

-by stealing just one strand of your hair, they can shapeshift into a clone of you and destroy all your relationships with your friends and family or launch an intergalactic guerilla war against the solar federation

-poop on your floor and in all your cabinets

Are these really risks you feel comfortable taking? With some of Muscles' Mouse Traps© you'll be safe from all the vile dangers of a ravenous hoard of mice or your credits back!*

(Muscles & Sons LLC is not liable for any misuse of traps, ineffectiveness of traps, injuries sustained from traps, exposure to carcinogenic compounds in the traps, or injury to pets.

Muscles' Mouse Traps© contain chemical compounds known by the Aldebaran system to cause diarrhoea, nausea, fainting, melancholia, Air Bud sickness, Lou Rawl's disease, Fantasia, paranoia, delusions of grandeur, and itchy toenails. Please use with caution.)

#Introductions #introduction

Hello, My name is Leopold Hatfield, but everyone calls me Muscles.

I'm the chief medical officer aboard the starship #JupitersGhost. I joined the Space Corps to help make a difference for people who don't always have access to Advanced Medical Care (and also to swindle whomever I can swindle, but please don't tell the Captain.)

I'm selling Moustraps, if you need one. They're 5 replicator credits. I know that sounds steep, but you've got to understand two things: 1) These are artisanal, small batch mousetraps made by the finest antique labor using 800 year old manufacturing practices 2) There are literally thousands of mice infesting every surface on the ship, and if you don't buy a mousetrap from me to protect yourself, you may never sleep again.

Also, uhh, here's a selfie.

[Listen to our adventures](https://intergalactic.computer.