Doctor Leopold "Muscles" Hatfield
.
@muscles,
Things you didn't know mice could do:
-enter your dreams and steal all your secrets and blackmail you
-by stealing just one strand of your hair, they can shapeshift into a clone of you and destroy all your relationships with your friends and family or launch an intergalactic guerilla war against the solar federation
-poop on your floor and in all your cabinets
Are these really risks you feel comfortable taking? With some of Muscles' Mouse Traps© you'll be safe from all the vile dangers of a ravenous hoard of mice or your credits back!*
(Muscles & Sons LLC is not liable for any misuse of traps, ineffectiveness of traps, injuries sustained from traps, exposure to carcinogenic compounds in the traps, or injury to pets.
Muscles' Mouse Traps© contain chemical compounds known by the Aldebaran system to cause diarrhoea, nausea, fainting, melancholia, Air Bud sickness, Lou Rawl's disease, Fantasia, paranoia, delusions of grandeur, and itchy toenails. Please use with caution.)